Pregnancy is a beautiful journey to experience. You become more in-tune with your body and how it functions to care for a child before and after birth. There are an infinite number of joyful and thankful moments ahead, but don’t be alarmed if you feel negative emotions now and then. It is natural to feel scared because everything you are going through is foreign. The best way to overcome those feelings is finding the answers to your questions. It would be impossible to cover every single pregnancy-related topic, but the following list covers the basics.
1. This is definitely not a good time to be nonchalant about what you do and don’t know. Check out local birthing classes to gain a structured education and connect with other pregnant women going through the same experience. If you want to vent and discuss your concerns in a casual setting, consult mothers that you trust such as relatives and close friends. For medical questions, go directly to your midwife or doctor. Even if you think your questions are stupid, ask them. Though you don’t want to worry yourself into a state of paranoia, it is better to be safe than sorry. You should be aware of what is going on every step of the way.
2. Discussing exercise and a healthy diet while pregnant can be bothersome. You don’t always feel well which means minimal eating and movement. It may cause you to cringe, but this subject is important because it benefits both mother and baby before, during, and after labor. To the best of your ability, eat a balanced variety of foods and introduce some pregnancy-friendly fitness into your daily routine. Every mom is different so don’t be ashamed to go at your own pace. Consult your doctor to clarify what exercises and foods are safe for pregnancy.
3. It is important to have a birth plan in place for organization and peace of mind. However, don’t hold on too tight to expectations because there are numerous variables to consider. Labor could happen at anytime, and that time may not be the most convenient. It might take more than one day or only a few hours for the actual birth to happen. Unexpected circumstances may force you to exchange a homebirth for a hospital or vice versa. A cesarean section might be the only option for a safe delivery. Your baby may decide to come into this world early or later than expected. You might receive the surprise of a lifetime when your little one is not the gender you were expecting (rare, but still possible). If the unexpected happens and you feel disappointment forming, remember the only thing that matters: giving birth to a healthy baby.
4. Levels of stress previously thought to be nonexistent are about to become normal. It will be daunting to do something as simple as hold a short conversation in person or otherwise. Though you may be tempted to cut off all human interaction, don’t let exhaustion cloud your judgement. If someone offers to help you with meals or housework, accept their offer. They may not cook your favorite food or clean the way you would, but none of that is important. You will be thankful for any help once the baby arrives.
5. There are few things stronger than the bond between mommy and baby, but don’t forget about dad. He also needs one-on-one time to bond with the newest family member. It will be tempting to step in if you hear anything close to a cry, but that is not advisable. You won’t always be around to help so give him space to learn on the job. The unique dad style of parenting is very popular with kids so trust that he will learn quickly. If you haven’t already figured it out, this is a prime opportunity to accomplish tasks that aren’t possible with a baby.
6. Relatives, friends, and the internet are great sources for parenting tricks. These are just a few examples. Before you splurge on fancy baby gagdets, consider purchasing something less expensive or using what you already own; for example, a bottle sanitizer can be replaced by mild soap and hot water in the dishwasher or sink. For the first few months, the most important clothing items you will need are onesies and socks; everything else will most likely be outgrown before it’s worn. When you pack an extra outfit for baby, pack one for yourself; chances are you will need at least a new shirt to avoid walking around in public with an assortment of stains for accessories. The list goes on and on and on. Many things will be learned as you gain experience, but it’s nice to find yourself ahead now and then. That being said, every child is different so don’t expect every tip to work.
7. In the thick of the madness that is life as a new mother, an overwhelming number of opinions will bombard you. While it is convenient to have the presence and listening ears of family and friends, their mommy advice will not always be what you need. Research mommy and me classes and support groups in your city. It will do you some good to get out of the house and connect with moms parenting children the same age as your child. You might even find lifelong friends for you and baby.
8. Adjusting to the new baby and figuring out a schedule will require trial and error. Accept now that there will be very little glamour, peace, privacy, and sleep. Once the chaos dies down, you can introduce some normalcy back into your life. Use every single second that your little one is asleep or being watched by someone else. Take a nap (number one priority), exercise, shower, fix your hair, put on makeup, or (if you absolutely must) clean the house. Time spent child-free will give you a much-needed break and make the moments spent with your baby even more special.
9. For the sake of your sanity, accept that no two experiences are alike. Breastfeeding is not possible for all moms. Bonding with your baby may not happen right away. The pregnancy weight might require an extra kick or two to get the message and take a hike. Your baby might grow and learn at a different pace than other kids. It is normal to develop postpartum depression, and you are not alone in the fight to overcome it. The ups and downs you go through will make your experience as a mother unique. Comparing yourself to other moms will only rob you of precious minutes that could be spent with your bundle of joy.
10. The housework can wait! Take advantage of the baby years and squeeze in as much cuddling and playtime as you can. There will come a day when your child is an independent adult, and time spent together is a luxury. Don’t let the crying, dirty diapers, and messes weigh you down now. Once it’s over, you will want to do it all over again because it went by so fast.
You are about to bring a new life into this world. That is a great deal of responsibility, especially for someone who has never been a parent. Pregnancy nerves are intimidating, but they don’t have to be overwhelming. Your body is ready for the task ahead, and your instincts will kick in when the time is right. Keep yourself busy because there is a lot to accomplish and no time to be scared. You’ve got this, mama-to-be!
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